By Jemima Pereira (webmaster@jemimap.cjb.net)
© September 2000
Codes: J/C, challenge
Rating: PG
Series: Star Trek: Voyager
Warnings: profanity

The challenge was "Write the same final J/C scene from the POV of the PTB then from the POV of the J/C fans. (Two scenes)."

This parody is protected by the copyright laws of the United States of America. Read 'em and weep, Paramount.

My beta reader tells me I'm very literal.

POV of TPTB:

Scene: the Bridge. Flash to viewscreen - stock footage of DS9. JANEWAY and CHAKOTAY are alone on the bridge, the last to leave the ship.

CHAKOTAY: It's been a pleasure serving uh...with you, Captain.

THE POWER THAT IS (aside): Why can't that damn Chicano remember his lines?

A POWER THAT WAS (aside): His line, you mean. The series finale and you gave the First Officer one line.

TPTI (aside): Put a sock in it, Jeri.

JANEWAY (putting her hand on CHAKOTAY's chest in that warm but entirely chaste Captainly way she has): The pleasure was all mine, Commander. I hope we can do it again sometime.

TPTI: Cut! Kate, you promised me no mugging this season!

MULGREW: Shall we shoot it again?

TPTI: No, leave it. For some reason the fans like to see you overacting and Robert grinning his ass off. OK, everyone, break the set! Thank God it's finally over.

BELTRAN: Amen! So when does the Barbie of Borg movie start filming, Brannon?

TPTI: Get off my set, both of you. Damn actors...


POV of JETCers:

Kerry, Caff and Jade are huddled around a giant projection TV - when it comes to Chakotay's dimples, there's no such thing as too big.

"Shhh, here it comes!" Jade commands the unruly audience.

CHAKOTAY: It's been a pleasure to serve u--

"Under! Under! Under! Say it, Chak!" the JetCers chant.

CHAKOTAY: --with you, Captain.

"His last chance, and he blew it," Kerry moans.

On the screen, a mammoth hand touches The Chest. "Hold on! She's pawing him!"

"Way to go, Janeway!"

JANEWAY (in that husky, come-hither voice we all know and love): The pleasure was all mine.

"You go, girl!"

JANEWAY: I hope we can do it again sometime.

A collective sigh suffuses #jetc. Caff immediately begins an episode addition about a rented holosuite on DS9. Jade and Kerry try to pin down that look in Janeway's eyes when she said 'again'. The Faith lives on.

THE END